Saturday, June 16, 2012

Happy Father's Day, dad. Miss ya lots!


Dad at 16. (The man was born with a briefcase in his hand)

*My father was a very charismatic man; a man that loved to talk, loved to laugh, loved to tell a story or a joke. Even though it is a great loss, it also tends to be his legacy to our family. We are reminded daily of his many pearls of wisdom he said to us when he was with us. One of my favorites was “live life as if every day is Christmas and every night is New Years Eve” which probably described him as a person and how he lived or wanted to live his life from day to day.  Never one to search and find he would always say, “Ask questions, you’re in America now.” Being one to never back down from a fight when believing I was right about something he would remind me that sometimes you could win the argument and lose the war. For that reason I try to pick my battles and only go to war over something when I truly believe I am right. Being a salesman he believed in the saying “the customer is always right”.
Dad's 30th birthday
At some time I hope to gain greater peace about the things that I failed to talk with him about like the fact that life is not always fair and sometimes pain is a very real experience and not always as bad as it seems at the time.  I wanted him to know that it was okay to cry sometimes especially when you’re giving your daughter away in marriage, okay to feel sad like when your favorite pet dies and even though you love dogs you shouldn’t deny yourself the love of one because you will be sad when they die, okay to even share the pain of others like at funerals even though we hate going for fear of crying ourselves. I guess his pain took a back seat to what he wanted to see as reality for himself but I always hoped that he would come to a point where it wasn’t seen as such a negative experience for him.
Family vacation 1955

We all think about those that went before us and reflect on what we would say or do if given a second chance. For my dad I would find a quiet place outside, maybe an empty park bench somewhere.  I would tell him that I never got to truly express to him that I love him. I would tell him how thankful I am that he loved me throughout his life especially during the times when I didn’t deserve it. I would tell him that I wished he would have taken our advice and gone to the doctor. Maybe then he would have had more time before he died.  I would thank him for making my life fun since as an adult we sometimes tend to forget how to have fun. With that being said we would stand up and I would give him something that I never could throughout most of my life; a hug. We would then part ways and walking away I would wave to him just as he waved to me so long ago standing in our back yard running up to the house from a friends home when it was dark outside.  I would smile and wave and watch as he is taken up with God. 
*excerpts taken from a story I wrote called "Life With Father",  2007.

Dad, the Barbecue Man!
        













My father was a very charismatic man; a man that loved to talk, loved to laugh, loved to tell a story or a joke. Even though it is a great loss, it also tends to be his legacy to our family. We are reminded daily of his many pearls of wisdom he said to us when he was with us. One of my favorites was “live life as if every day is Christmas and every night is New Years Eve” which probably described him as a person and how he lived or wanted to live his life from day to day.  Never one to search and find he would always say, “Ask questions, you’re in America now.” Being one to never back down from a fight when believing I was right about something he would remind me that sometimes you could win the argument and lose the war. For that reason I try to pick my battles and only go to war over something when I truly believe I am right. Being a salesman he believed in the saying “the customer is always right”.




At some time I hope to gain greater peace about the things that I failed to talk with him about like the fact that life is not always fair and sometimes pain is a very real experience and not always as bad as it seems at the time.  I wanted him to know that it was okay to cry sometimes especially when you’re giving your daughter away in marriage, okay to feel sad like when your favorite pet dies and even though you love dogs you shouldn’t deny yourself the love of one because you will be sad when they die, okay to even share the pain of others like at funerals even though we hate going for fear of crying ourselves. I guess his pain took a back seat to what he wanted to see as reality for himself but I always hoped that he would come to a point where it wasn’t seen as such a negative experience for him.

We all think about those that went before us and reflect on what we would say or do if given a second chance. For my dad I would find a quiet place outside, maybe an empty park bench somewhere.  I would tell him that I never got to truly express to him that I love him. I would tell him how thankful I am that he loved me throughout his life especially during the times when I didn’t deserve it. I would tell him that I wished he would have taken our advice and gone to the doctor. Maybe then he would have had more time before he died.  I would thank him for making my life fun since there seems to be so little of it these days and as an adult we sometimes tend to forget how to have fun. With that being said we would stand up and I would give him something that I never could throughout most of my life; a hug. We would then part ways and walking away I would wave to him just as he waved to me so long ago standing in our back yard.  I would smile and wave and watch as he is taken up with God. 
        










Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Oh, to be twenty-five!

Twenty-five years ago today around 8:15 in the morning (contrary to popular opinion not all kids are born in the middle of the night) I had my last child. He was my smallest kid weighing in at 5 lbs. Today he is a wonderful young man with a healthy work ethic (he works two jobs) and a fairly good outlook on life. I'm blessed to call him my son. Even though he has lived away from home for +4 years he always loves to stop by and shoot the breeze with his mom, help his dad with car repairs, and play with the dog. I find comfort in knowing he makes God a part of his life and has many friends with which he can lean on as well.
Happy birthday, Daniel and many blessing today and always!
Mom
Daniel and David at Grandpa Fiedlers
Another birthday today for my youngest. The years are going way to fast for me maybe even for him as he said he is too busy to have a gathering on his birthday but will wait until Sunday with the family since it is my moms 89th and Fathers Day. Lots to be thankful for. I always felt cheated when I had him since I couldn't take him home with me when I was discharged (he was 5 lbs and hypoglycemic) but that is history and today he is a young all of 25 yr-old young man with dreams and aspirations. I am proud to say even though he has moved away from home some 4 years ago he still loves to stop by and shoot the breeze with his mom, goes to church and loves the Lord, and is now heading back to school to finish what he started. I was stranded at Lake of the Isles 3 weeks ago, Michael was out of town so I called him even though he was sleeping from working the night before at his job. He came, started my dead battery and followed me home. Sometimes it's hard to see the roles reversed but I don't know what I'd do without him in a situation like that. He definitely knows his cars.
God's blessing on you Daniel and many more to come!!!
Mom