To the Soul There is Hardly Anything More Healing than Friends

So much has happened in the last month. Many of you know Daniel, my youngest got married the same day that my mom fell and broke her hip. She died one week later at the ripe old age of 90. My cousin from Seattle said that her father's (my mom's brother) experience with hospice was not that great. My mom's was pristine. The hospice group that followed her (thru Park Nicollet) calls me every month to see how my family and I are doing. They also have monthly support meetings at the hospice my mom was at when she died. Her care nurse throughout the 2 years she was in hospice visited her not only on her appointed days but when she fell she visited in the hospital after work and one of the last days my mom was alive. I can't say enough about them and would highly recommend that group of wonderful caregivers. I always tell them to contact Mainstreet. Outside of my children she is missed terribly over there.
That being said, I have been her sole caregiver and now after her death there is alot to do: papers, phone calls, financial issues, cleaning out and closing down the apartment. My brother came and took what he wanted and left. I haven't heard from him since. I also haven't really grieved even though I miss her. Especially when I see her face in a picture. Yesterday I was over at her apartment cleaning out her stuff and sharing some of her usable items with the residents (they have a table in the basement you can put out reusable items) and I picked up a piece of paper off the floor in the bedroom. It was one of her last grocery lists. Those are the things that send me over the edge. That and seeing the residents come up to me and tell me how much they miss her. I try to go at night so I won't run into them. Otherwise it's a cry-fest. I never allow anyone to cry alone in my presence (from Green Fried Tomatoes). One thing they all say is she never complained. I'm trying to pattern that into my own life.
I would highly recommend Mainstreet. She loved being there, made getting old not look so bad, and her friends there were like a second family to her. I'd move in tomorrow but I don't think Michael would go. Oh well.
Anyway, I found a picture that was given to her of a dinner that some of the gals went to about 4 months ago. It's become one of my favorites. She looks so very happy and that's the way I wish to remember her as. Life was good in between the pain. (The title is from Thomas Moore)

Mom with some of her Mainstreet friends

Fargo-Moorhead

At the game with friends

Spent the weekend with a few friends in Hendrum, MN.  Lots of visiting over coffee and card games. The finale of the weekend was a Redhawks Minor League game which they won and which ended with some magnificent fireworks. A couple of grand slams made it pretty enjoyable and I'm not much of a baseball fan.  I actually never like camera pics of firewords but wanted to try out my camera. This wasn't the best one but now I know I can get some pretty good shots with the right setting.

fireworks

Came back on Sunday evening to the aftermath of writing thank you cards for the memorial that my mom gave to. Will need a few weeks to get the house back together and her apartment emptied out. Nice to get away for a bit.

One Left to Go

A symbol of unity by combining ingredients in each vase

Daniel got married today. It was enjoyable even though tremendously difficult from a physical standpoint. Michael started cooking for the grooms dinner and wedding reception 3 days prior. I thought I was working in a restaurant; stir this, grind this, zest this, peel this, etc. He had tripled all the recipes and we went at it. Everything turned out in the end. Even James came from West Virginia to be in the wedding. (on the left of the picture at the bottom).

Aiden (Hannah's boy) as ring bearer and Emily (a cousin) as flower girl

Lovely day, lovely bride, handsome groom and lots of friends and relatives. At the end of the day we loaded up the car to the hilt and drove home. I admit I shed a few tears watching time move swiftly forward and my youngest boy turn into a married man. I was so proud of him esp when he told me that he knew that dad and I had sacrificed so much the past week to make the wedding a cherished event that he wasn't expecting a gift from us because we had already given our "all".

Presenting the married couple

He was also very proud of Hannah as were we with her ability and time spent organizing, planning, ordering and working so hard to make everything non-food related come together.



 

Long-time friends from his childhood

As I write this they are on their way to Wisconsin Dells to enjoy a few days swimming and relaxing. the weather is cooperating as well as our temps should reach the high 80s.
Have a good time Daniel and don't be a stranger.  :)  Love, Mom

4th of July at Mainstreet

Mom celebrated 4th of July early at Mainstreet with a picnic.

Dicky and I joined her for a lunch of traditional picnic fare and were entertained by a Dixieland band.

Fun time visiting with mom.

Another Wedding In The Works

getting ready to open presents and enjoy the day

Went to a shower for Daniel's bride-to-be in Clearwater, MN. It was put on by her various aunts and cousins. She got some wonderful gifts and everyone enjoyed the time together. Even though Hannah is an only child she has many extended family that she enjoys at holidays, etc.

party guests

My mom was invited so it was nice for her to  get out and take a small "road" trip. She did real well overall.


Everything went well and we topped the day off with cake. Even the weather cooperated.





Hand embroidered kitchen towels



Hannah with the grandmas!



Next Sunday will be one that I am hosting with her various girlfriends from the area. Sure to be fun.
 

The Timex Watch

Her cake. It was much larger that the picture appears

Well, she made it! Mom hit the big 9 0. When her cancer returned 9 months ago they gave her 6. I remember saying to myself that I would continue on as if she would take one day at a time. I continued with that theme letting her know where our Thanksgiving day would be and her comment was "I won't be around by then". She made that holiday and the one after that again stating she would be "gone by then".

Her goal was to make it to her 90th birthday. There were tons of cards, flowers and well wishes. She had a marvelous time with all her friends and family enjoying cake and refreshment.

Karen (daughter) and Dick (brother) performing for Mom

This may be her last big "holiday" however she is shooting for Daniel's wedding on July 13th. I wouldn't place any bets on her not making that event. I just told her to put one foot in front of the other and move along. Her best friend, Joyce told her to follow God's message: This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it. All I can say is to refer back to my May 30th post. It truly is God's love for us and His grace and love for her that she is still with us.




Holding up the flashing ring she got as a gag gift from her best friend, Joyce Haha

Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all the fathers out there and those in heaven like my own. I picked two pictures. One of him during WWII as an enlisted man in the Navy. Even though he disliked the service immensely (another story) I thought it exemplifies him as a man with much of his life ahead of him. He was about 25 years old here. The other one, even though it isn't the best pic of him I chose it because he LOVED swimming so it seemed appropriate for me to post him doing what he loved.