This is a poem that I wrote a couple of years ago. It was part of an assignment for a class at the University of Minnesota.

Olive-green Dress

 

A plain but pretty olive-green dress all the way from Bangladesh.

Riding on the coattails true of happy little girls in blue.

Why she wore it no one knew. It wasn’t red or happy blue.

“It’s not a play or painting dress” her mother said

but nevertheless

To look her best she shunned the rest

                                                             and wore her dress

from Bangladesh.

                                                                        C. Fiedler 2022

 

Things I Wish I Could Tell My Mother

 

 

 

I didn't have a great relationship with my mom. I know she loved me but possibly didn't like me. Alot of it was revealed through some therapy. I figured out that she might have been jealous of my dad's relationship with me. My dad worshiped the ground I walked on and we were very close. I wish I could have assured her of my love and relationship with her.

I recently found out that I have a processing problem because I had a stroke before I was born. It causes me to be clumsy and uncoordinated at times. Math is also a big problem. She developed names for me like Gracie from George Burns and Gracie Allen. I never got to explain to her my situation but neither one of us knew at the time. 

Another thing I wish I could tell my mom was that I was sorry that I never learned about her as a person. I never knew her wedding date or had a wedding, like in a church. She never had a wedding dress. I learned after the fact that she left Minnesota and went to San Diego with some co-workers to find a new life away from her mom and dad. She was braver that I had ever known.

It pays to ask questions and learn about your family. None of us is around for ever.

Past and Present 2025

 My life has its ups and downs. When I turned 70 was when I felt that my life was heading into its golden years. I have always been a person that moved fast, physically and mentally. It was mostly due to my ADD. Even with medication I have realized that rushing is a problem when you reach 70. I have to force myself to slow down and smell the roses, take one step at a time, and get a good night’s sleep or a rest time when the opportunity presents itself. Life is short. Why ruin it with a broken bone or sprained ankle.

When I was a child I ran everywhere. I hated being in the house and consequently I loved the outdoors. More space, more air etc. Sometimes I would lay on the grass in the back yard or at the park and watch the clouds move through the sky. I was always looking for angels. I use to think I saw birds or some kind of being floating among the clouds, however I was never afraid of what I thought was up there.  

When I traveled with my folks on a road trip I loved to sing. It annoyed my brother so I eventually stopped singing. I believe it caused a loss for me because I can carry a tune even though I don’t have a quality voice. The other way I use to amuse myself was to watch the horizon. I would make up stories in my head believing there were Indians riding their horses along the cliffs and hills. This thinking came because I loved westerns. My favorite was Bonanza.